


when tears can't fall

by bj62



Category: I Spy (1965)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-03-22 17:32:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13769067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bj62/pseuds/bj62





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [my heart who still beats within me](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=my+heart+who+still+beats+within+me).



Kelly Robinson had a relatively quiet childhood. His father worked for the government and he found himself being shuffled from one relative to the next or in an apartment on the wrong side of town, when his mother could find work. Occasionally, he would get a note or surprise visit from his father. He definitely resembled him. He had a growth spurt at the age of ten and his mother was surprised at his his height when they moved to another state. He was used to being made fun of and tried to shrug it off. Ironically, he took after his father in more ways than one. He found he liked being a hero and working for the government. One of the first heroes he had ever met was looking at him once more.

She stood before him. The time that had passed made her even more beautiful than when they first met.

It was a lifetime ago, but it was yesterday. She had a beauty that had shown from within. It lit up the room if one only looked at her the right way. She had seen beyond the awkwardness that came with his height and gangly legs. She may have lifted her head, but she looked at him eye to eye. For the first time since being the new kid on the block, he felt a sense of belonging.

He was tall for his age. He was heads above the rest in his grade by at least 6". Being new to the area made it all the more awkward. It was there on the playground where he fended off the fights that he saw her watching him.

He caught himself watching her and noticed that she spent time alone. She commanded a presence at the tender age of twelve, and when he finally finished with the bullies, he saw her come toward him. The blush traveled from his toes and he hid his face until he felt her fingers reach out.

He couldn't speak. He found himself gripping her hand and the world narrowed down to just the two of them.

The spell was broken by the bell. 

He didn't even know her name. Her smile lingered as he went to class and only knew for sure that he would see her again on the playground. He had reason to come to school.

She had changed, but the years had been good to her.

It was as if all those years were erased and he was that awkward shy little boy, that took her hand all those years ago. It had to have been twenty years ago at least. She stood there surrounded by strangers, but all he could see was the girl in skirt with a red sweater. All he could feel was her bravery and kindness that stood out from all the other girls in the playground. All he could see was the same recognition in her eyes as he tried to remember her name when he had the courage to walk her back to class. He had hoped for a friendship to blossom, but in the next few weeks, he had moved once again.

This time it was more permanent. His father, who he barely knew, died in service to his country. He was once again placed with another relative he barely knew. He learned to grieve quietly, He was afraid of making too much of a fuss. He hid his grief and once again tried to fit in to a group of new people. Initially his mother was not there. He was not allowed to go to the funeral. All that remained of his father were a few memories a ring he wore on his finger, and a medal in a satin box. The satin had faded to a dull grey. Not once did he take it out and pin it to him. It belonged to his father. In his eyes, it was sacred.

So here he stood looking at a girl from his past. He stood looking at her, knowing she was looking at him in the same way...

It was as if only the two of them existed. He reached out for her hand and saw her do the same.

"Thank you. " he said awkwardly as he took her hand as he did all those years ago. He fought the blush that was rising to his cheeks. There was no one there but the two of them.

Then he felt a touch on his shoulder. The man was two inches taller than he was and muscles hung on him like a suit. It would intimidate any man, but not Kelly Robinson. He faced tougher odds once too often. He had the security of knowing that Alexander Scott was by his side.

"Leave my lady alone. " the taller man said as he took her hand from Kelly. He only saw her as the man removed her fingers from his grasp. He saw a glimpse of pain wash over her face as the connection was broken. He felt a surge of anguish and the need to confront the bastard that disturbed his reverie. He was about to do just that, when another hand touched his other shoulder.

"Kel. Let it go. You are not here on your own time. Our Uncle needs us." Scott said.

It was enough to get him out of his reverie.

"I know her. It was a lifetime ago and despite the time, I can remember it from the moment I saw her." he said as he started to walk out the airport with his friend. He knew his uncle took priority. He knew he had a responsibility to God and country.

But there was a part of him that was with that woman, who was a girl in his eyes, that was being dragged off in another direction by a behemoth that could walk through a locked door.

If there was time he would find her again.

He was fine with leaving her alone until he saw the monster yank her arm nearly out of its socket. He heard her moan of pain.

He took action. He tripped the man.

"Sir you seem to have lost your footing. Here, let me help you." Kelly said using a vise grip.

The man stared daggers into Kelly and was about to fight back when he saw Scotty on the other side of him. He knew he was outnumbered. Despite his physical strength, the two men possessed a an agility and determination that would undo his ability to fight and win.

Kelly focused his attention on the woman. He saw her nursing her arm and was surprised to see that she was neither defending nor accusing the man who had hurt her.

"Beth? My God are you alright? Why would you let yourself be treated that way?" he said as he looked into the eyes that were that of the young girl who had helped him all those years ago.

"It's all right. He doesn't mean to hurt me. He just gets jealous sometimes." she said as her eyes betrayed what she wasn't saying.

Scotty was getting the man out of Kelly's earshot, but he knew that he could not give his partner too much time. It was obvious that she was in a relationship with the man who was sitting and touching his ankle.

Kelly looked at her with concern and noticed the ring. He realized that he had involved himself and his partner in a domestic dispute. He almost wished he had never seen her. His mind screamed in frustration knowing that he was involving himself in something that was none of his business. He was unable to stop himself because she was still that young girl in the red sweater. She was still the one who reached out after he was confronted by bullies. The man he tripped could have easily been the ringleader all those years ago. 

Scot walked over to where the Kelly and the woman were sitting quietly.

"I have to go. It was great seeing you Kel." she said as she walked back to her husband. 

Kelly watched her posture as she walked by to the behemoth who was staring back at him warily. Every fiber in his being was screaming to take action, but his partner stopped him.

"It was her choice." Scott said quietly.

Kelly watched them until they were no longer in sight. He got up with the weight of his shoulders and looked at his friend.

"How?" was all he could manage to say. He kept remembering the girl in the red sweater. He remembered the smile and her eyes... Then he remembered the pain in her voice just moments ago. He was normally a man of action, and here he was sitting on his hands while someone he had cared for once before was walking out of his life again.

It was as if the passage of time had gone in an instant. He knew his uncle needed him, but there was a sense of desperation after seeing Beth that he just couldn't dismiss with a call from Russ.

He would find a way to help her. He was good at helping damsels in distress. He felt he owed her for all those years. He could not let her stay with such a man. Marriage or not, he would not let a woman: any woman, especially her, be someone's punching bag.

He had seen too much of it growing up. It was more acceptable then. Regardless, when it came to women, Kelly respected them too much. He knew that his mother would have liked to stay with his father. He knew that his father's dedication to his work took precedence. His mother did the best she could. She had seen how her father treated her mother like cattle and it made him ill. He swore he would never treat anyone like that, least of all someone he cared about.

Now he was seeing it all over again... First hand.


	2. Chapter 2

Kelly woke in a cold sweat. The nightmare had taken him back to when he was a child. He watched from the top of stars. His father was concentrating on berating his mother after coming back from some convention. He watched the figures transform to that of Beth and her husband with dire consequences. He took some slow deep breaths and hoped he had not woke his partner in the next bed.

He had to give his father credit, he knew where to hurt his mother the most. The bruises would fade but the words cut deeper. It wasn't that he was afraid of his father, but there was a distance between them and it wasn't just because of the traveling he did for his job.

He watched in fear as he hid in the darkness. He could not understand how his father could do such a thing to his mother. Surely the man knew that the boy could hear, if not see what was happening.

He had been ashamed because he was too afraid to confront the man. He had seen the pattern emerge as early as he could remember. At first he thought it was something he had done. He could hear his name being mentioned and wondered if he was the cause of the tension between his parents.

The man was still his father, right or wrong. Despite what Kelly recognized today as torture, he still had love for the man. When they spent time alone, Kelly found some way to relate to him. As long they were involved in his father's passions, things would go smoothly. If he veered off track, he would see a fraction of what his mother was exposed to.

By the time he hit thirteen, his mom died. His father made sure he was taken care of, but rarely saw him. The death of his mother changed his father. It was not until his late teens, that his father developed an awkward relationship with his son. By the time Kelly had been recruited, his father was in ill health.

He kept a safe distance from the man. He was still afraid of what he might do. Seeing his mother being hurt so early on, left him leery of the imposing figure. Besides which, despite his height, the man still towered over him in Kel's eyes.

He had forgotten what city he was in when he heard the news of his death. He was too busy making a career and winning tournaments. At least it gave him a chance to establish his cover. It was then that they paired him up with Alexander Scott. 

He found himself sharing the man's mother. The woman took one look at him and knew that Kel needed the care of a good woman. Although she knew that they were trainer and athlete, she sensed something more. She had seen both her son and his friend with bruises that could not be gotten from the 'game' of tennis. But she knew better than to let on... There was no sense in worrying her eldest.

So Kelly lay there taking slow deep breaths and almost willing himself to sleep. Morning would come soon enough.

Morning and another job from their uncle... The sooner he got done with it, the sooner he could help Beth. He closed his eyes and listened to the quiet.

"It will work out Kel. You have to have faith." Scott said as he turned his back to his friend.

Kel was tempted to smile. He still could not get anything past his partner.

They slept.


	3. Chapter 3

When Russ Conway got to the office, the team of Domino was in its usual form. Kelly was his usual bored self and Scott was full of nervous energy. Russ had been informed of the incident at the airport. The last thing he needed was a familiarity with the targets of another black ops investigation. He knew that Kelly could usually distance himself from the parties involved. When he learned that Kelly knew the woman in question, it made the mission all that tougher.

There was usually a snowball's chance in hell that either of the men would know the subjects. Knowing them would make it twice as difficult. How was anyone to have known that someone from Kelly's past would be a prime figure in an investigation?

He looked at the team together and took a deep breath.

"This is a tough situation today gentlemen. It seems that unbeknownst to knowing both of your backgrounds, i seemed to have missed a detail or two. Just how long have you known Beth DiCienzo Kelly?"

Kelly was shocked at the last name. This was the first time he heard her married name and he was kicking himself for not having recognized the man she married. It should have been obvious that the behemoth was related to a crime family that went back at least two generations. He was too concerned with seeing how he manhandled her to pay any attention to details. He had been transported in time.

"What is the assignment Russ?" Scotty asked to take some of the pressure off his partner.

"He really had to make a scene at the airport. I did not recognize him. I was too distracted by the way he treated his wife. I wanted to keep Kel on the straight and narrow. By the time they left it didn't register." he added.

"Let's have all of it." Kelly said in a dead voice.

"You are to keep them under surveillance without them knowing they are being watched. Robert DiCienza in not sure if he wants to turn state's evidence. He is here with his wife on a weekend getaway. The state department wants to make sure he is alive and well come Monday to discuss the possibility of how he wants to proceed. This does NOT mean that you interfere with the marriage. That is why I ask again... Kelly how do you know Beth?" Russ said.

"It was a lifetime ago and if you are asking me to be an observer of her being brutalized by her husband, I cannot guarantee that i will sit by and watch ANY woman be treated that way."

"You've already made that clear. He knows you now by reputation. He may not be too keen on seeing you in his rear view. You have to convince him that you did not recognize him at first and that you thought she was alone, What ever you do make nice until Monday; You need to be protecting them both without letting them know." Russ said.

Kelly looked at his boss and mentor and shook his head slightly. "What you ask may be impossible." he said in a controlled tone.

"I've been told that team Domino can do the impossible. That's all gentleman." Russ said as he handed the file to Kelly and left them to sort it through.

"you can do it Kel. All you need is your hands tied behind your back and a gag in your mouth. Remember our cover. You are a tennis bum and I am your trainer." Scott said.

Kelly shook his head and looked at the file. What was the worst that could happen.

He dare not answer that question....  
.


	4. Chapter 4

Kelly sat like a lead weight was attached to feet. He took a cigarette from his pack, lit it and inhaled slowly. He held it for a second and a second more as the smoke went into his lungs. When he expelled it from his lungs, it came out long and slow.

"Of all the gin joints in all the world she walks into mine. She stood up for me. When no one else did, she stood up for me. I found the strength to fight back in her eyes. They haven't changed. They are still the same color. She still has the same smile... And now i find out she is married to one of the lowest pieces of scum... And our job is to keep that manhandling bastard alive so that he can turn states evidence? We have to make it appear as though we are 'friends'? I have to deal with that bastard like he is - " Kelly said and was interrupted by Scott.

"WE have to act as if nothing is wrong and he is the kindest man on earth. WE are in this TOGETHER. We have had worse assignments. On any given day this would be a cake walk. The difference is that you happen to know the woman. She is in your blind spot. Talk Kel. Tell me what I need to know. Did you love her? Do you still? How far did it go? It isn't your life that is on the line, I have a stake in this too. Own up to and tell me before i am likely to put my ass on the line for the likes of you." He said as he looked him straight in the eye.

Kelly hated it when Scott did that. He hated it because he had to own up to his mistakes and the baggage that came with them. He had been friends with this man for a lifetime. He would not hesitate to protect him from what came their way. However he never expected that his past would interfere with his work. Sure he knew that friends from years ago would be following his career in tennis, but this was different.

It was bad enough to know that Beth was being abused by her husband. But to learn that their next assignment involved babysitting her and the man who nearly yanked her arm out of its socket, was almost intolerable. He took another puff on his cigarette and without thinking crushed what was left of it in the ashtray. He stood up, straightened his suit, and proceeded out of the office with Scotty in tow.

"I never even kissed her. It was a different time and another lifetime ago. I will do what needs to be done." Kelly said.

Scotty looked at his friend and partner. Sometimes, it meant keeping an eye on his better half. They were two sides of the same coin. Kelly's familiarity those involved meant that Scott would keep a more careful eye on his friend. That was nothing new. The one thing Scotty knew for sure was that between the two of them the job would get done. They had a higher success rate than other teams the agency put together. One of the reasons for that was because they knew there was no clock to the work they did. Down time was a rarity and it they took breaks when they could. But when the job was as important as this one, there was no such thing as time off.

It was time to start the long standing charade of Kelly Robinson, tennis pro, and his trusty coach sharing the lifestyle of the rich and famous. Three days of what would be pure torture for a man who still had feelings for a girl he had never kissed.


End file.
